no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
