tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
