I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
