How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
