this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
