Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
His nipple licking is glorious
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