My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
