We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
