with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
