um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
