i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
