I swear she didn't look like that last week.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
