u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
my shit smells like andre
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
