I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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