We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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