I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
