why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
