imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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