Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
