I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
