I'm drive I can fine osifer
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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