I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
