As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I wish i was in the wii world.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
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