Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
