First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
