you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
