You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
wow bdsm is so cute
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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