Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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