i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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