I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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