But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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