is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
