I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Can I color on your dick again?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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