the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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