don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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