Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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