Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
