Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
