Are we in a gay sports bar?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize