I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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