Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
