Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
