Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
