shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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