ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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