awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
We have so much sex to catch up on
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
