is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
