My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
