Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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