I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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